Saturday, January 28, 2012

16 Weeks

Stats:

How far along: 16 weeks- holy crappo this is going by fast!   

How big is baby?: An avocado  this week. 4-5 inches in length and weighs 3-5 ounces. Several of my students ask each week how big the baby is. This week one said that we should start calling the baby whatever produce it is that week, so she is calling the baby Avocado this week.

Total weight gain: Almost 3 pounds this week!!! Crazy. I've gained a total of almost 7 pounds this pregnancy, which means almost half my weight gain was added this week...I really haven't been eating any more than usual this week, but I guess my body is holding onto more of it. 

Maternity clothes: Wearing yoga pants a lot these days... at work we call them black dress pants though, because I wouldn't dare wear yoga pants to work :) Most of my shirts still fit, some are too tight but some of them are really cute with my little belly poking out. In my mind it makes me look pregnant, but I probably just look fat. 

Best moment of the week:
 Hearing the heartbeat again. Even though hearing it involved a "crazy pregnant lady" moment, it was very reassuring and made me feel good that my little alien is in there and growing away. 



Food cravings: More Cheerios :) And Diet Pepsi, though I'm trying to limit the amount of Diet Pepsi I drink. 

Food aversions:  None :)
Zoey was feeling left out! 

Symptoms: I keep getting this weird pain in my lower right ab... kinda feels like pulling a muscle and makes it feel sore. I've been somewhat tired this week, but nothing close to what I was feeling in the first trimester. I felt well enough to hit the gym more regularly! I've had a lot of congestion lately and a few nosebleeds which is just obnoxious. 

Movement: Hoping for it to happen soon, but I know it could be another month before it happens. 

Gender: Find out in 32 days. For now I have my guesses. The Chinese gender calendar says boy, the fast heartbeats we've heard every time (all over 150) suggests boy, but my doctor says my intense morning sickness in the first trimester suggests girl. In my gut, I think it's a boy... but we will see. While I'm talking about gender, I think you should look over to the right and vote for what you think it is... come on... go ahead :) 

What I'm looking forward to: My appointment next Wednesday. I get to hear the heartbeat again! 

What I miss: Still missing sleeping on my back, I just can't get comfy on my side. 


Next appointment: Wednesday! This is the last appointment before our anatomy/gender scan. 

Friday, January 27, 2012

I swear...

This thing inside of me*, I swear, it's not a baby, it's a tapeworm






Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm hungry... again...






* I say "thing with the utmost love and affection

Thursday, January 26, 2012

I forgot to mention...

You know the other day when I mentioned my crazy pregnant lady day?


I left out the part that REALLY got to me...


As I was heading out of school, to go to the doctors, because I was freaking out... a student asked me:


"What happens if the baby dies in side of you? Do they like take it out?"




What the &@*#&$#(@#(@*#*#*!!!!


On all days to say something like this, it had to be the day I was already convinced my baby was dead... seriously???? It took all that I had in me not to start sobbing at that moment. I know this kid well, he wasn't trying to be wise, rude or mean, he was genuinely curious and concerned, but it hurt, it really hurt. 

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

The universe is conspiring against me!

Every since my November OB appointment, I've been trying to get a freaking flu shot:



  • Went to place # 1, was told that my insurance wouldn't cover it there
  • Went back to place # 1, intending to just pay out of pocket and was told that there was no one in the pharmacy who was licensed to give the shot that day (well then take down the freaking sign out front that says "Flu Shot Available"... clearly not!)
Forgot about it for a little while until my December OB appointment where the nurse got mad at me for not getting it yet.

  • Went to place #2, was told that they are out of the shot, but to come back in Mid-February
At this point I was just annoyed and considered forgoing the shot all together. But of course I did some research and discovered that even if I don't get sick this year, having the shot can give the baby some immunity to the flu for next season... fine, the quest continues:
  • Today went to place # 3, THEY are also out of the shot
  • went to place # 4 and was told they don't have anyone on staff to give the shot
Here's the part that REALLY bugs me. All of the places I have gone have had signs out front encouraging me to come in, get my shot. Assuring me that they have the flu shot available.

CLEARLY NOT

My plan is to try place #5 and possibly #6 (if 5 is a dud) which are both next to work, I'm going to try right after work tomorrow... but if these two don't work out, I think I'm giving up, cause this is getting ridiculous. And if I go to SIX places and can't get the damn shot, then I am going to assume that this is just the universe's way of saying not to get one. 


Tuesday, January 24, 2012

That crazy pregnant lady...twice...in one day

Crazy pregnant lady episode # 1


I keep a box of Cheez-Its in my desk... cause baby loves them (at least I tell the kids it's the baby). They always settle my stomach and are a great quick snack. So today I'm sitting on a desk, eating my Cheez-Its while I read aloud to the kids at snack. Snack ends, I put my book away, send the 5th graders to math and usher in my 3rd grade math class.


The Cheez-Its? GONE


How? Where the heck did they go? Who would steal a pregnant woman's Cheez Its???? I looked EVERYWHERE. My kids looked EVERYWHERE... no Cheez-Its :( And they were sad too, cause they thought the baby would be missing it's snack and they worry about my little alien (which is actually pretty cute)


Fast forward to 5pm, as I'm heading out the door. I'm packing up, grabbing my coat, and decide at the last minute that I'm going to bring my laptop home.


And there they are. Sitting behind my laptop. Right. On. My. Desk.


How did 23 students AND I miss those all day long? It just makes no sense.




Crazy pregnant lady episode #2


I worry, you all know that, but today it got to be too much. For about a week now I've really been stressing about the baby and whether it's okay in there. I'm at the point in pregnancy where I'm over the morning sickness, which was my sign that things were going well, but I'm not far enough along yet to feel movement, which will be my next sign that things are going well. Right now I have no sign... and it is SCARY. Last night I had this way-too-realistic dream in which I went to my next OB appointment and found out that the baby had been dead for weeks and just floating around inside me.


Freaked. Me. Out


So I called my doctor today. And cried. Until they gave me an appointment. And I went in today and heard my little alien's heartbeat.


All is well with the world :) 


I felt crazy and stupid and over-dramatic...but I am so glad I did it, because it made me feel so much better. 


On a side note, as I was leaving school early to go to my appointment, one of my kids asked me what happened if the baby died inside of me...right like I needed to be asked that, at that exact moment. SERIOUSLY?!?

Monday, January 23, 2012

Heartbreak

Today I watched an 11-year-old, stand up at her own mother's funeral, and speak of her mother's love and kindness.




E-LEV-EN




It broke my heart to watch this little girl, a student of mine, speak with wisdom and composure that is far above her age.




I'm so proud of her.  

Saturday, January 21, 2012

15 Weeks

Stats:

How far along: 15 weeks.  

How big is baby?: A navel orange this week. 4.5 inches in length and 2-3 ounces. How has something this small changed my body so much?

Total weight gain: I gained almost a pound this week. Bringing my total gain to almost 4 pounds.

Maternity clothes: Still squeezing into my prepregnancy clothes... I'm avoiding buying anything new until I have to. I would hate to buy a bunch of clothes and then outgrow them in a week or two. I'm just pulling out clothes that are bigger and using safety pins, elastics, or the BeBand to hold up my unbuttoned pants. 

Best moment of the week:
 A student asked me this week where the fluid around the baby when when it was born. I told her it came out. Her response? She wanted to know if it came shooting out of my belly button when it was time for the baby to be born! I had to laugh 



Food cravings: Lots of Cheerios! I mean like 1 1/4 boxes eaten just this week alone. I've been craving Diet Pepsi (regular diet, not the caffeine free crap) this week too, so I let myself have a glass tonight... SOOOOOO good. 

Food aversions:  Nothing again this week, food and I are pretty good friends right now. 

Symptoms: Still tired, some trouble sleeping at night. Still getting that uncomfortable pain on my lower abdomen that feels both tight and sore. Nothing new this week.  

Movement: Nothing yet, but I keep waiting and hoping (though I know it often doesn't happen until week 20 with the first... a girl can still have hope) 

Gender: We find out in 39 days... can't wait! Until then, you should vote in my poll on the right to let me know what you think it is.

What I'm looking forward to: My next appointment in just 10 long short days. I also can't wait to feel this little alien move!

What I miss: Not too much... I miss sleeping on my back, sleeping on my side makes my back and hip sore


Next appointment: February 1st. Can't wait to hear the little pitter-patter of this baby's racing heart. 

Thursday, January 19, 2012

It's Ok Thursday

Its Ok Thursdays4

This week I'm saying "It's Ok"

To already be tired of people telling me how I "should" do this pregnancy/deliver my baby... the next 6 months are going to be long if people can't stop this crap

To be wearing my hair up AND a headband today because I was too lazy to straighten my hair... hey, it gave me my blogging time

To be going to work late because I'm blogging this morning

That I had Monday off, yet already feel like I need another day off... SOON!

To be devastated because one of my students is experiencing a great loss... and there's nothing I can do about it

To find it crazy that as of tomorrow, this school year will be half way over... where has the time gone? 

To really want the next two weeks to fly by so I can hear my baby's heartbeat again...I need that reassurance that all is well.


Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Mom Fail

Everyone keeps telling me that having my dog is like practicing for a baby. Which in many ways it is. I have to feed her, bathe her, take care of her messes and give her love. I feel the responsibility for another life, whether it human or canine is remarkably similar. I also truly believe that a child may be easier in the long run than a dog... since the child will eventually learn to communicate its needs and even take care of those needs... while a dog never will (though I keep waiting for Zoey to be potty trained... it could happen!) 


With that in mind, I've been very proud of us for keeping Zoey alive for a whole 2 1/2 years... not bad, right? 


Today, after I had been home for more than an hour, Drew noticed that Zoey's water bowl was bone dry.


Mom fail.


This baby is screwed. 

Monday, January 16, 2012

Dear Zoey

Dear Zoey,

Hi puppy, it's your Mama with an important message to you:

You are nine pounds... NINE

Therefore your stubborn attempts to hunker down and pull on your leash in an attempt to stay outside in the cold, not going to work. I have two options when you do this; 1) pull until you start walking or 2) scoop you up and carry you inside. Either way, you lose. Please understand that I don't do this to be mean, but rather because I'm cold, and we've been outside long enough. If I could potty train you, and avoid the whole outdoor piece all together, I totally would.

Love,
Your pregnant Mama who isn't going to let you stay outside in the cold.

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Birth Plan- Part 1

I'm calling this Part 1 of the birth plan since I'm only 14 weeks and I'm sure in the 26 weeks I will be making additions and changes to my plan, but I do want to write about it as I go. Please keep in mine that my plans are just that, mine. So please don't tell me you think I'm wrong or get offended if my ideas don't mesh with your own. I know that my opinions and beliefs about childbirth don't work for everyone, and that's fine, because they work for me. 


Already I've been told that I'm crazy for how I want to deliver this baby. And while I understand that people have their own opinion on childbirth, I don't understand their need to push their beliefs on me. I don't look down on people who want to do things differently from me, that's their choice. 


 I've known from the get-go that I want a natural childbirth. I am not saying that when push comes to shove (haha, get it?) that I won't take any pain meds. I can't claim that when I've never experienced anything like this before. However I am adamant that I do not want an epidural and that I want minimal to no pain meds. I'm by no means an all-natural or organic type person. However, I am very against epidurals for two major reasons:


1) My baby. I'm spending 9 (really 10) months trying to protect this little life from all the things that can harm it. I'm avoiding chemicals, raw fish, caffeine and a whole host of other things that may affect a growing fetus. I even avoid things that aren't scientifically proven to be unsafe, just because there is a chance it could hurt the baby. Why, then, at the moment my baby is entering the world, would I expose the baby to major drugs? It just seems stupid to me. Research shows that epidurals not only slow down labor, which is hard on the baby, but that the drugs go right into the baby's bloodstream. I know labor is painful, I'm not deluding myself that it won't be, but I also know that it's my job to protect my baby and I feel like taking drugs to ease my discomfort is not the way to go.


2) Needles scare the poop out of me. Especially ones in my back. The thought alone of an epidural makes me feel a little faint and sick. No way in hell am I letting someone stick a giant needle in my back. Even if I felt like it was perfectly safe and would make me more comfortable... hells no. Not happening. 


I know I don't have the greatest tolerance for pain... I'm a downright wimp. But I also know that I've never had any good come out of pain before, so that will change things. I also have some plans for reducing labor pain that I will write about at a future date. I know it's going to be tough. I know it wont be fun, but I also know that it is worth it to me to do this for my baby.

Saturday, January 14, 2012

14 Weeks

Stats:

How far along: 14 weeks.  

How big is baby?: The size of a lemon now and growing fast!

Total weight gain: Huh, I lost a pound this week, so my total weight gain is at 2 1/2 pounds which is a little low. I feel like I eat plenty, but I'm eating (mostly) healthy and working out so I guess I might not be consuming enough calories...or maybe I'm just a slow gainer. I'm not complaining, I just want to make sure I have healthy weight gain for the alien. 

Maternity clothes: Most of my clothes don't fit, but at least my bump finally looks more baby and less chunk. 

Best moment of the week:
 Seeing my bump start to grow and feeling like I look pregnant now. 



Food cravings: Love milk still. My real cravings this week have been for Cheerios (with milk!) and toaster waffles with butter and syrup... so yummy! 

Food aversions:  Nothing this week, food and I are pretty good friends right now. 

Symptoms: Still really tired, but I've been sleeping a little better this week. Not great, but better. I've had some pain in my lower abs that I assume is round ligament pain. Feels kinda like a stretching feeling and they feel sore like I've worked out hard.  

Movement: Not yet, but It's (supposed to be) starting in the next couple of weeks, so I'm getting excited. 

Gender: We find out March first... I may or may not have an app on my phone counting down to that... but if I did, it might say that we find out in 47 days...not that I'm counting or anything...

What I'm looking forward to: Our next appointment and the start of movement... can't wait!!!!

What I miss: Nothing really. I'd love some more sleep, but I don't really feel like I'm missing anything right now.


Next appointment: February 1st. Which may or may not be in 18 days... not that I'm counting that either :) 











Wednesday, January 11, 2012

The mind of a 10 year old

A conversation with a boy in my class:


Boy: How do you go to the bathroom when you're pregnant?


Me: Um... just the normal way


Boy: Aren't you afraid you're going to pee the baby out?


It's a good thing puberty class starts next week... these kids need to get their facts straight! 

Sunday, January 8, 2012

Dear Baby- End the first trimester

*Clearly the pregnancy hormones have kicked in and I'm feeling rather sentimental about the end of the first trimester. Since I want to document everything pregnancy-related on this blog, here is my end of the first trimester letter to my little alien.*


Dear Baby,


We've made it to thirteen weeks now, the end of the first trimester. You're still growing strong and getting bigger and bigger everyday. It amazes me that we are a third of the way through this journey. It feels like just yesterday that I got the positive test and sat on the couch crying with joy with your daddy. I know that this time will feel like it is forever, but in hindsight will have sped by, so I am making it my mission to enjoy every moment with you as you develop in side me. 


Knowing that I am creating something so precious and real, is an awe-inspiring feeling and one that I've never experienced before. Already we've experienced so much together. I will never forget the first time I saw you in that first ultrasound, or the first time I heard your little heartbeat, and I will NEVER forget all the times you made me sick... trust me, there will be payback for those weeks, be prepared. 


Looking forward, there are so many amazing things to come. I can't wait to feel you move for the first time, if you don't mind, you could just hurry up on that! I can't wait to find our what you are, so I can start referring to you by name... or at the very least by a proper pronoun. While I love calling you my little alien (since you've invaded my body and taken over) I can't wait for you to be my little baby (okay, I guess I can share you some with your daddy... maybe). 


So keep growing little one. While I'm anxious for your arrival, and can't wait to meet you, I know you need time to be ready for the world and I feel so blessed to be able to experience this with you. See you in July!


~Mama 

Saturday, January 7, 2012

13 Weeks

Sorry about the crappy pix this week, camera was dead so these were taken with my iPhone.


Stats:

How far along: 13 weeks. Now officially in the second trimester... wow that feels weird to be able to say! 

How big is baby?: The size of a peach this week.

Total weight gain:I gained 2 pounds this week!!! That kinda freaks me out. I mean, I've been eating more but not that much more. That brings me to a total of 3 1/2 pounds gained so far. I'm still a little low in terms of what I have gained so far compared to what I should have gained so far. But, since I spent a month throwing up everything I ate, I think I'm doing pretty good.


I've kinda got a little bump going. Granted, it's mostly fat/bloat... but I'm blaming it on the little one, cause that makes me feel better.

Maternity clothes: This week sucked, clothes-wise. Some things fit, others don't... and I look like I've been scarfing the cupcakes. Ok, ok, so I have, but THAT's not why I have a gut right now. I want to look pregnant, not just fat, so this in between time stinks. 


Best moment of the week:
 Telling my kids :) I sent a note home for parents on Thursday. On Friday I talked with my kids about it for awhile. They were psyched and are really trying hard to name my baby... Their names are a little odd...


Food cravings: Always thirsty and still loving my milk... I've been craving sweet stuff the last couple of days, nothing specific, just wanting something sweet.

Food aversions:  Nothing really. I'm so glad that food doesn't make me feel gross anymore. 

Symptoms: So so so so so tired. I feel like a walking zombie. I was sleeping so well those first few weeks, but now I can't sleep more than like an hour or so at a time. I keep waking up through the night to switch positions, fix the blanket or because I'm too hot/cold. I can't seem to get comfortable. I blame part of it on trying to sleep on my side. I've been a solid back sleeper my whole life, but my doctor said I needed to start sleeping on my side. I'm trying, but it's just not comfortable. Last night I just had this sharp pain in my side every time I tried to lay on my side, it's just so uncomfortable and exhausting... I seriously think I might try sleeping on the couch tonight, maybe the different type of "bed" will help me get comfortable. 

Movement: We're weeks away from that! (but getting closer every week!!!!!) Some of the pregnancy forums I read have women who claim to feel the baby starting at week 12, but that seems a little far-fetched to me. Wishful thinking has me hoping it comes soon. My books say anywhere from 16-20 weeks is usually when you first feel it. Any moms out there want to share their experience? 

Gender: We find out March 1st!!!! It's so close, yet so far away... I want to be able to think of "it" as him or her, and start really thinking about names. We've brainstormed but it's so hard to really pick something when you don't know the sex. 

What I'm looking forward to: Hearing the heartbeat again on February 1st and then finding our what we're having just a month later! 

What I miss: SLEEP!!!! I just want to be able to sleep normally again. 


Next appointment: February 1st

Friday, January 6, 2012

I underestimated them.

I totally underestimated my students. I really didn't see how observant they really are.


I sent home my parent letter yesterday, letting them know that I was expecting, but that it wouldn't affect this year's students since I'm due over the summer. I figured that I should take a little time this morning to discuss it with my students and see how they were doing. When I asked how many of them knew before the letter, about half their hands were raised...well, I guess the cat was already out of the bag...


One kids said to me: "Well, I kinda thought you might be, but then you were eating all the time... like ALL THE TIME, so I figured you were probably just getting fat."


They all had name suggestions... most of them weird names, like Phineas and Ferb, or Digley. 


Now that they know, it's so funny that they're making connections to things that have been going on the past couple of weeks; like my frequent bathroom breaks, constant eating and how tired I've been all the time. 


I love them though, my kids are so happy for me, and are asking how I'm feeling. A couple even asked if they could get me anything, or help me out. It's days like this that I really love what I do. 

Why I love what I do

Student: You should name the baby Owen

Me: What baby?

Student: Your baby!

Me: I don't have a baby

Student: No, but you're getting one

Me: I am? Where do I get one of those, the supermarket?

Student: No (exasperated) you're.... you're birthing one

Me: I am?

Student: I...I think so

Me: Oh, when am I doing that?

Student: Uh... tomorrow? 

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Thank You / Words with 5th Graders

Thank you all for your responses to my request for advice last night. I was really freaking out, and your suggestions really helped. I tried to meet with my principal today... but that was impossible, so instead I e-mailed her and explained the situation. Hopefully I will hear back from her sometime tomorrow.


The part I left out yesterday is that my principal really wants me to send a letter home to parents before I say anything to my kids. That is why I was worried about a kid asking me. I don't want to lie, but I want to respect administrations wishes to inform parents first. It was this delicate balance of waiting as long as possible, but not so long that I was put in an awkward position.


What I've decided (pending approval from admin) is to send home a parent letter tomorrow in their weekly folders. The letter just says that yes, I am pregnant and that it will not affect this year's students as I am not due until the summer. If I send that home tomorrow night, then I can talk to my kids Friday during the day and answer their questions. Basically I'm following the advice of the people who commented yesterday, cause you all were right... I was just too emotional and over analyzing the situation... cause I tend to do that...


On a lighter note, this was a conversation with one of my students today:


Student: Can (other student) and I sit together???? (she was asking to sit with her BFF, whom she is VERY loud with)


Me: Is that a rhetorical question?


Student: I'm not a dinosaur! 


Duely noted! 

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

I need some advice!

Ok, so usually when I post a question or ask for advice on here, I get... crickets... nothing...(a little depressed) 


I mean I love you all, and you're great at commenting when I post my bling, stupid crap I do or when I posted about being all depressed about losing my job. But that's not what I need you for! So I am asking, rather begging, because I need some advice and I just don't know what to do.


The situation: My kids know. My brother-in-law's ex-girlfriend's next door neighbor (did you catch all that?) is one of my students. She told my brother-in-law that all the students in my class know that I'm pregnant.


The issue: My principal wanted me to wait until like March or April to tell the kids... it's January.


The Question: What do I do? Do I pretend that I don't know that they know? Do I just tell them? Do I just wait until one of them gets the balls to actually ask me?


So tell me what you think I should do, cause this is killing me and I really have no idea how to handle it. Honestly, pregnancy should come with a handbook about how to handle all the awkward and uncertain things that come up during those ten months... Page one of hand book should include a reminder that it's actually 10 months... no more of this 9 lie they keep passing around. 

Show Me Your Bling



On my first day back to work after my glorious vacation, I am linking up with CMae for Bling Bling show us your ring.




The Ring:
I love my ring. I especially love the fact that Drew picked it out himself. Granted, I did a few hint, hint, nudge, nudge moments in college where I showed him similar rings, but when it came to the actual ring, it was all Drew. I also love the  fact that my wedding band has some bling to it... I loves me some diamonds. 


The Proposal: 
December 26th 2007 Drew proposed on the beach by our house (he told me were were going to look for sand dollars... we didn't find any) Drew had done the sweet (and totally brave) tradition of asking my father's permission to marry me. Granted he waited until my dad was on the roof of the shed shoveling snow (less chance of attack) but my dad didn't seem to mind much. His exact words were "Well, I let you have my beer-making stuff... I guess you can have my daughter too." Gee thanks Dad, glad to know where I rank in the scheme of things!  



Monday, January 2, 2012

Moment of Panic

Not really panic... I just kind of freaked myself out a little bit.


At around 9 this morning, I was sitting on the couch in my PJ's when I suddenly wondered "I DO have the day off... don't I?" Not sure why, but I was doubting which day vacation ended...so I checked my district website.


Phew... back to enjoying my lazy day :) 



Sunday, January 1, 2012

I guess I'm getting old...

I've never been a major New Year's person. I mean I've always had fun on New Years, but it's never been something I've felt the need to get all dolled up for and go party until I can't tell what year it is. Most years Drew and I attend my parent's party which is very casual and low-key... and loud. It's fun, but it's not something I look forward to each year with a burning enthusiasm. Usually I have some drinks, eat a lot of good food and cheer when the ball drops.


This year, it was just tiring. I took a nap yesterday afternoon, but by 11 I was crashing. I wanted to curl up in my bed and go to sleep. By the time the ball dropped and everyone was cheering, hugging, and drinking champagne... I just wanted to peace out of there. We were on the road by 12:15, and it only took so long because everyone wanted to hug us goodbye.


I'm excited that 2012 is here. This is the year where our baby will be born. The year that our lives will be forever changed...but I would have been fine waking up this morning to discover the new year. Not sure if that makes me old or just lame. 
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