Friday, July 20, 2012

Friday's Letters

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Dear Fynn,
I don't think I ever properly thanked you, but thanks for coming 11 days early... it pretty much made my life since I was a miserable, uncomfortable angry preggers by that point. Thank you for taking pity on me. Now take pity again and sleep more than an hour at a time during the night.
Love, 
Mom


Dear Other Drivers,
Hi, you may not be aware of this, but I have a newborn in the back seat. Back off and let me drive 10 mph below the speed limit and slow down 100 miles before I turn. I know I'm driving like a little old lady, but if you saw the little peanut I've got in that carseat, you would drive really slow too.
Thanks,
The nervous mama in the black car

Dear Drew,
Please grow some boobs, so that you can feed our daughter. I love breastfeeding, but not at 12, 2, 4 and 6 am. Sleeping for a hour at a time is not cutting it.
Love,
Your tired wife

Dear Zoey,
I'm so sorry you're not getting the attention you used to get. I still love you as much as ever, I promise, but there's this little creature who needs me so much right now. I swear, some day I will make it up to you someday. Just know you are the best dog ever!
Love,
Mama

Dear stupid woman at the breastfeeding group last week,
No, your milk did not curdle inside of you when you sat out in the sun. The fact that you actually asked that question out loud says a lot about you.
Sincerely,
Still laughing

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4 comments:

  1. Okay, I don't even have a baby and that last one actually made me laugh out loud.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Your little girl is SO cute!! The last one made me laugh SO much, how crazy was she?!?! I'm actually a little bit speechless about that! Have a great weekend! xo

    ReplyDelete
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